"Life Force"
The Plot: there are evil, life destroying beings on the loose, and the only person who can stop them (presumably due to some excess life force of her own, or something) has been brought to Emelan from the modern world.

Formerly known as "Please help me write my first ff"
I haven't read many fanfics, i've never written one, and i have no idea where this story might go. Any comments/suggestions will be appreciated. So, without further ado...

Niklaren Goldeneye looked into the seeing stone, his face creased with worry. Something was wrong, terribly wrong. And the only thing he could do to stop this evil from increasing was utterly impossible.
No one had ever sucessfully crossed dimensions before. That is, no one had ever crossed dimensions and lived. But something had to be done. This great, unspeakable evil was coming, and there was nothing else he could do to stop it. He would have to cross over.

* * *

"But you can't go to another dimension without me, you just can't!" shouted the redhead.
"I don't think you fully comprehend the seriousness of the situation," Niko replied gravely, "I could die doing this! If you came with me you would almost certainly be killed."
"If you could be killed, then why are you doing it?!" Tris yelled, exasperated.
"Because if I don't we will all die."

* * *


here's where the story forks. i don't know wether i should have niko go to tortall or the modern world. please help me decide.

Edit: yay! I finally have a title! *jumps for joy*

Whatever you want, it doesn't sound very helpful, but it's true. Bawdy kinda means controversial, naughty, does that describe Tris? Think about the plot and write for both ways and whichever is easier or more interesting for you to write is the best one. Good start so far! Post on fanfiction.net, you can create your own account for free.

Hannah, the internet junkie, queen of procrastination, countess of the Tris/Briar fandom, moody/cheerful kid, weird one, chronic reader, garden lover, science and history geek, Keeper of all things Monet, Hopeless Romantic, daydreaming queen, drawing freak, animal and dog fan
~~Briar: Oh, she’s got to be ganged up. How else do you survive here?
Rosethorn: You! Teaching table manners! You!
~~Kel: But he’s got the LIONESS for knight-master!
Dom: You think that’s FUN?
~~Sandry: Take care of yourself, Uncle. Let your merchants scream in the courtyard where
you can’t hear them. The exercise will keep them young.

I think it would be fun to do it in modern times b/c they already use magic in Tortall, and their culture is similar so it wouldn't be so much of a shock to him. Tortall would be fun though, b/c you could have him meet Numi and get help from him or somthing like that. So, what I'm trying to say is that I think you could make it work either way, and each would have it's pros and cons.

Or, and this might not work for what you were planning to do, you could have Niko go to Tortall, make friends with Numi, and then find out that the help he needs is not in Tortall, but in the modern world. Then he (and Numi might want to help him) can come into our time. That way, you could get both stories in one. Sorry, this dosen't make much sence how I wrote it, but it seems like it could work in my head. You may not want to listen to me, however, as I am still working on my first fan fic.

Good luck, and I hope I didn't confuse you too much. Post it when you finnish it!!

~Katie

Quote of the Month: "Never call a man a fool, just borrow from him."

~Katie


I do believe in commas. I do, I do. ~SBP

Makes sense to me- I like that idea.
Ok, I finally shortened my titles! My top 10 favorites are here, the rest are on profile!
, AKA Lostlainwen, Sultana of India, Commander of the Queen's Ladies, Guardian of All Tigers, Rider of the Gold Dragon Sirith, Weyrwoman of Benden Weyr, Bearer of the Robin Daemon Kari, Faerie of Summer, Fake Girl, Most Frequently Baffled Person on Sheroes AIM Chat, Took-long-enough-to-get-here-but-finally-is Girl of the 1000 Posts Club, Lady-Vassal to Her Imperial Majesty Tamora Pierce, Empress of the Universe, and Her Consort, the Almighty Tim the Administrator**~
Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary there!
Note- I am a shameless quote stealer. If you see a quote that was once on your sig, I probably stole it from you. If you mind, PM me and I'll take it off.
Note again- I did not make that wonderful blinkie. It was make by a .neko. on the pink poogle toy forums.

Ok, here's the next bit:

Slowly and carefully, double-checking the scroll many times over, Niko mixed the ingredients of the draught that might keep him alive through the dangerous process of changing planes. At any rate, it would keep him from being boiled alive in the vast cauldron he was using as transport.
"Thankyou, Briar," he said to the teenager who had just brought in a basketfull of herbs. "Did you get the mistletoe?"
"Yes," Briar replied, "and I sure hope you're happy with it. The oak it lived on was very unhappy to have someone climbing on it, no matter how necessary it was."
Niko shredded the mistletoe into the cauldron. It had been boiling for days. 'So much preparation' he thought, smiling to himself, 'but the whole trans-planar trip will take less than a second. Ironic, really.'
The draught was ready. Niko poured most of it into a vial, and gulped down the rest. It was burning, spicy, and strangely sweet. He spoke the incantations over the cauldron, and, tucking the vial into his robes, plunged into the bubbling liquid.
For a moment, the world around him spun, then he got his bearings. A normal man never would have gotten them; simply opening one's eyes between dimensions was enough to drive a person insane, or even kill them. Niko thanked the Gods for his Sight, which allowed him to navigate thee transplanar field and actually get to the dimension he wanted to go to.

* * *

Niko looked around. He was in a forest. Alone. That was OK, he had'nt wanted to land directly beside anyone, it would scare them. He looked for the trans-planar barrier. That tree. The big red maple. Very big. Gods, that tree must be five hundred years old. At least it was a memorable place. Now he just needed to find the one who could stop them. the only one who could stop the Prilas from destroying his world, and, eventually, all worlds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~* * *~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I hate everyone!"
This is what Louisa thought as she stomped out to her family's stable, where they owned and boarded horses, and this is what she shouted when she tripped on her way inside. Racer, one of the horses, snorted his displeasure at this sudden loud noise. She was in no mood for him.
"Ah, shut up, ya old mule," she muttered
*I am neither old, nor a mule. I am a well bred thoroughbred horse, with a pedigree longer and better than yours.* retorted Rallomonde's Golden Racer, an ex-racing palomino stallion, out to stud for the past two years.
*I'm sorry, you just act like such an ass sometimes that I get confused.*
Racer put his ears back, then turned away, deciding to ignore her. Louisa hated him almost as much as she hated his owner, but for different reasons. Mr. Rallomonde treated his horses like they were nothing more than living machines that existed only to make him money. Didn't he realize that animals had feelings too? With a sigh, Louisa tacked her horse, a beautiful liver chestnut named Flavia, and led her out of the stable.
*Where do you want to go today?* Louisa asked her as she hoisted herself into the saddle.
*I don't know, what about you?* replied the mare.
*How about the east trail through the woods? It's so pretty right now, the leaves are just starting to turn.*
Their minds made up as to where to go, horse and rider turned towards the forest path.
*Whats wrong?* asked Flavia. *You feel upset.*
Louisa wanted to say "nothing". That was what she had told her mother, when she'd stormed through the house that afternoon, and that was what she had told everyone else who had ben brave enough to ask. But it would do no good to lie to a horse. Most animals could tell when you were lying.
*I got in trouble again at school today*
Boy, had she. She really hadn't meant to hurt that boy so badly, he was just an incredibly bad fighter. And he had been torturing a toad. Ripping its legs off. But when it was over, she had broken two of his fingers and his nose, while she only had a few scrapes and bruises. She picked up the toad while she was being escorted to the principal's office, and, out of mercy, killed the poor, limbless creature as she was led through the halls.
*They're suspending me for defending a toad.*
Flavia breathed her sympathy.
'I wonder who that could be,' Louisa thought,looking ahed at a tall, thin man. He was dressed very strangely.
"Hello?" she called tentatively.
"Greetings, child, my name is Niklaren Goldeneye." Gods, it was her! He had just arrived, and already she had come to him!
"I would like your help, if you would be so kind as to give it to me."
"My name is Louisa MacArthur; What do you need help with?"
Niko explained the situation as best he could.
"So, wait, you want me to go with you to another dimensional plane, because i'm the only one who can stop these Prila thingies from destroying the universe?"
"Well..."
"COOL!"
"So you'll do it, then?" asked Niko.
"Absolutely! How could I not?" Louisa replied "But what will i do with my horse? You said we would come out in a cauldron, and she'll never fit in one of those!"
"You can leave her here. Less than a second will elapse, no matter how long you're gone. Now, drink this."
He handed her the vial of anti-scalding potion.
Louisa drank the stuff quickly. Based on what she had read, potions were always sickening and awful-tasting, so she was surprised at the spicy-sweetness of this one (though not the fact that it burned like brandy).
"One more thing," Niko said as they prepared to cross over, "No matter what happens, you must notopen your eyes until I tell you it is safe to do so. Keep them tightly shut."
With that, the two of them walked into the big maple tree-portal, Louisa holding tightly to Niko's hand.

* * *



Whew! that was a lot of writing in one sitting! So, what do people think so far?

I htink it is great but sad that she couldn't bring her horse because thay would have help each other in the other world. But still great!

* Fuzzie*

Guardian of Talien-black diamond dragon
Proctector of a black faol called Breeze.
Official Jeweller of the Royal Household
Koala-maiden of the Banjiku tribe
Supporter of Kel and Cleon Together Forever


Genius,pure genius - Tigger
Time for somthing sweet - Pooh
Looks like Saterday, feels like Monday - Eyore
no interupittin' - Tigger
Think less, Bounce more - Tiger
Easy come, Easy go - Eyore
"Neal!" she yelled "Roald, Seaver, Merric! I can stay! I can STAY!" - Keladry

Ch. 2:

Louisa was vaguely aware of a warm, bubbling sensation. She felt herself being lifted out of the liquid boiling around her. 'No, it's so warm. Please just let me stay.' Suddenly, coughing and sputtering, she came to her senses. She felt dry, but she was soaked to the skin. A woman stood before her. She appeared to be asking a question.
"Hm?" Louisa asked, when she found her voice.
"I said: drink this," she replied, handing her a cup. "Many of the herbs in that brew you've just come from are deadly. This will expel them in case you've accidentally drunk some."
Too dazed to protest, Louisa downed the contents of the little cup. This one was bitter, and it sent her gut into violent protest. Gratefully accepting the bucket the woman now presented to her, Louisa expelled the contents of her stomach.
"Thankyou," she croaked when she had finished.
"You're welcome. It's not often one is thanked for making a person throw up," She replied, "now, what's your name? Mine is Rosethorn, and this is Briar."
Louisa looked to Rosethorn's left, and there, sure enough, stood a boy. He looked about 15 or 16, and he appeared to Louisa to be the handsomest boy she had ever seen. 'He's just seen me barf,' she tought, blushing.
"Louisa. My name is Louisa," she replied, realizing that she had been staring, and blushing again.
"We are pleased to meet you, and grateful for your help," said Rosethorn, "come into the house, and we'll find you some dry clothes.
Louisa was led into the main room of a large-ish cottage, where a fire crackled merrily in the hearth. She sat down wearily beside it. Why was she so tired? A few minutes ago she had been full of energy, ready to plunge into another dimension. Another dimension. She was actually in another dimension. She looked around. It didn't feel any different. It didn't look much different, either. Here were some more people to meet.
As she was hande a bundle of clothes, Louisa was introduced to 5 more people: Lark, Sandry, Comas, and Tris, and when she finished changing she met Evvy, Daja, Frostpine, ande Kirel.
"So you're here to stop the Efili?" Tris inquired.
"No, the Prilas," Louisa replied.
"They're the same thing. Prila is just a general term for an unspeakably evil entity," Tris cried, exasperated. "Niko, why did you bring her here if she doesn't even know what she's doing?!"
"Tris-" Sandry began, but she was cut off by Briar.
"Because she's the only one who can help. I'd like to see you try to talk to one of them things."
"Actually, I think you have a point. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing, or what those things are," said Louisa.
"The Efili, or Prilas, are an evil non-creatures that are slowly eating away all the life in the universe," Niko explained, "and we need you to stop them."
"What's a non-creature, and how the heck am I supposed to stop them?" Louisa asked.
"They're like unmagic, only with life. While unmagic is like negative magic, a non-creature has negative life," explained Tris.
Sandry shuddered, remembering her encounters with unmagic a few years before.
"Huh? Negative life? Negative magic? Magic is real?" she asked, confused.
"It's like in math. 2-5=-3, and -3 is a negative number, right, well a non-creature is a life form with a negative life force, and unmagic is negative magic. And yes, of course magic is real." Tris said.
"Ha! I knew it!" Louisa exclaimed.
"Knew what?" asked Evvy, who had remained even as most of the others had drifted away from the conversation.
"That magic is real. Where I live, most people don't beleive in it, and the ones who do are called crazy."
"You must live around some strange people," Evvy replied increduluosly, "How can a person just refuse to beleive in something. It makes no sense. If I decided not to beleive in dogs anymore, they would still exist."
"I never said it didn't exist, I just said that very few adults actually beleive in it. Little kids often do, but they grow up with everyone teling them that it's not real, so they stop beleiving in it."
"That sounds like a very silly way to live," said Evvy.
"It is," agreed Louisa, "It most certainly is."


Edit: added more text